'Hey! you're too cute to be a doctor!"
A cynicist's take on the above statement would be...cute?
u mean ugly ..right?
A pessimist's take : I always new I was ugly....
A narcissist's take: just cute! I am pretty! intelligent! witty and sexy!
On a good day I would love to hear something like that and look into the mirror twice to confirm the same...on a bad day i would growl and cringe my face and think..damn! now I am too cute to be a doctor! not to mention I still have'nt got a PhD yet!
What would you think if you saw a tall balding, man,on the wrong side of 60, perhaps and a young woman, pretty,high maintainence,holding hands ?
Well it sure depends on where you are coming from and whether you are thinking your thoughts loud or not.
If it was someone else..I'd say..hey dont judge they could be father and daughter but if I were telling myself, I'd smirk and say...." ya right!"
The duo turned out be father and daughter. I was at the Chicago airport.
The point i want to make here is that I have forever told myself that I am not a hypocrite, but this particular incident points at the contrary.
For years I believed that there could only be good or bad. I remeber Shafiq telling me that people are actually not black or white ...everybody is a shade of grey. No pun intended.
I raised hell against girls who "used" guys , I still do..and hated guys who "used" girls...whatever that means...I've been there my self and as my mother rightly pointed out two weeks back, I have been on the wrong side of the fence more than once, each time trying to justify why that was "different"....however now that I come to think of it , it was not any different.
I had spent quite a bit of my 22 years trying to classify people around me into black or white. What a waste....
Look at God himself....Lord Krishna....teaches us in many ways that He himself is not without shades, not without chal and kapat(fraud). 'Shyam' is a name that suits Him litrally and otherwise.
We cannot try even if we do, to be completely 'black' or 'white'.
As such to call someone simply an optimist or a pessimist or any '....ist' ,would then be foolish.
We are a bit of everything.
No matter how much I love him, I always look at the price of the tickets before deciding to visit him or not. This practicality, inevitably lands me into a grey area. I am no more the white i always wanted and claimed to be.
So while I am whining about all things unwanting,unfamiliar and at way-off wavelengths here, in the US, the real problem is me, refusing to loosen my strings or my purse's strings, refusing to take a third person perspective. So when I say, "Ma, they either think I am too arrogant or too foolish", the thing is I really am arrogant and foolish.
And before I go pointing fingers at the world, declare myself a matyr at the hands of a foolish school or college crush, or circumstances and time in general, fish for compliments, milk in praise, try to do 'the right thing' or keep rubbing it in about what an epitome of goodness and putrity I am and STILL think i am 'white' [:)]........here's a reality check....the color's GREY....
As much as this is a reality check for me. This is a hand's on reality check for many people I know, who may need it. Now that I am grey I need not sugar coat my feelings...! yippee!
